Sunday, December 27, 2020

Ranga appearing for an exam!

Is Ranga appearing for an exam? 

Some of you may get the hint and know what I am about to say. For others no problem. We will go into that. First of all, thanks Ranga! for this morning tea in a wonderful daybreak. Sleeping teaches me that you are there even when I go absent from myself. Daybreak and waking up teach me that this is your world and for a second I do seem to realise that I also am yours but the long habit overtakes me with a vengeance. Who else but you can be so compassionate and patient towards such a dirty and nonchalant child as myself! Thanks for everything you have been doing me right from the start, even before the start. But to tell you a secret, don't mistake me! what secret can be there with you, You are the secret of secrets. Yet, many times I used to come straight to your doors and perhaps you may be expecting me to cross Aryabhataal gate but in the milling crowd I just slip sideways to Mother's sannidhi. You might have wondered many times where this rascal has gone. But to go to Mother is my weakness you may call it so. She also reprimands me many times that I give you a slip. But what to do? You are irresistible. But Mother makes it extremely homely with you. And you know, I am a sulking little brat. So I hide myself behind her saree and peep over to steal a look at you. So don't be angry towards me. I am such a faltering little fool that I really shudder when I think of appearing in your august presence. But Mother is kindness-incarnate that she removes all my apprehensions and with extreme care makes me see that you are more loving than your immeasurable greatness. Then I see you in your real nature of extreme agony of love, TIRUMAL. Love for the lost beings of this world! And I weep. I curse myself for all the days I distanced myself from you, for all the days I forgot you and ventured even to say that there was nothing like God. At that moment I feel myself so dirty and become so shameful to appear before you. But Mother is Mother you know! I know one of your secrets. You really are beyond birth. So to feel what it will be to have a mother you were born more than once, just for the sake of it, just to have a mother and receive motherly love. So you may understand me when I say why I am unable to resist running to Mother. So no more complaints on that, ok? 

But Parasara Bhattar also commented on this Motherly love and Motherly look once to you, is it not? Yea, I do remember it was on a Mohini Tirukkolam day. Nacchiyar Tirukkolam, yea. You will be appearing in the garb and apparel of Mother. So beautiful! and so very like. But did you pass that exam in bestowing the exact look which my Mother alone can bestow? The exam result is not yet out. How can it be? For, you are not separate from Mother and both of you are one whole Supreme Existence Consciousness Bliss. 

Happy Nacchiyar Tirukkolam Day! see you then.
Srirangam Mohanarangan 

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